Joint Statement from WAS-DEN

[tsweezy]

We, the assembled legal teams of the Washington Commanders and Denver Broncos, are issuing this joint statement to communicate a resolution to a simNFL internal matter that appears to have garnered undue coverage after an anonymous leak from office of the clerk of the district court.

After consultation, we have reached a settlement agreement to avoid any litigation, especially as that would tax the already strapped finances of that poor unnamed club in Colorado. Thanks to the diligent work of our commissioners we are able to accept the delayed movement of two 7th round picks from WAS to DEN. This is NOT an admission of guilt, we reserve the right to say we did nothing wrong and are innocent. In addition, we are announcing the end to an arms race. Neither team will trade for any players through the remainder of the season

We want to stress that a mutual understanding was arrived at after careful consideration of the following facts of the case - that Tsweezy played fast and loose with the rules of the trade interface, that he promised picks that were not deliverable, and that an error in procedure was made in the Broncos' GM department. That employee has been fired. However, we would like to add that we agree with their teams interpretation that there is no basis for a criminal charge of mail fraud in the promised delivery of two 7th round picks - as the picks did finally arrive. We consider the civil matter settled. In terms of criminal charges, we urge the Prince George County Prosecutor to focus on bigger priorities in their community, such as (this is a real stat) accounting for 20% of ALL MURDERS in Maryland. The Denver Broncos want to stress that Tsweezy and the Washington Commanders family are not associated with any potential criminal infractions committed in Prince George County, whether they be mail fraud or all those murders.

And an addendum that leaking sealed documents is a CRIME and those responsible will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law

Agreed, but definitely not a crime like all those murders. We would like to underline again that it is our understanding that Tsweezy is not associated with those crimes.

We would also like to take the opportunity to stress that GM tsweezy does NOT regularly eat crayons as a recent article has falsely quoted

To refocus this press conference, I would like to end the official comment section by reaffirming our commitment to legal and ethical football practices that both of our teams value as vital parts of the simNFL family. We here today all believe that the laying down of arms is not just a consequence of having exhausted literally every single potential trade partner in the league and all of our resources, but rather our focus on maintaining an equitable and competitive environment for all teams whether they're the Falcons working towards the #1 overall pick, the Panthers building for the future, or even the Bengals falling backwards into the playoffs again with their trash ass team.

We'll now take questions from the assembled press:

 

Pictured: Legal representation of the teams: 
DEN - John Elway, Esq. (no relation)
WAS - Unknown, (traded for cap considerations)

[kgreene829]

Having resolved your issues can I get comments from both of you about the leaked pictures of @TuscanSota I want to know how other owners feel about the birds behavior and also just had to ask John Elway are we 100% sure there is no relation